May 20, 2020

A Family of Bees

A Family of Bees

I just found out that today is International Bee Day! In honour of these beautiful, very necessary creatures that so often inspire my writing, I am posting this poem.

A family of bees

Sometimes life can be a sweet, sticky thing
like honey on your lips, a net
you get caught in
when your focus is elsewhere.
You wriggle around for a while
unaware your futile struggle won’t win you freedom
let alone respect.
Like the bees, I busy myself with the daily tasks
of caring, doing
be-ing
trying in any way, to build something
out of nothing
just loose ideals,
imagined hope
wisps of air.
She told me she was grateful
that I must not feel unappreciated.
There was fear in her eyes,
a sad, secret knowing of another’s pain.
He sent me messages, better burnt
words that can never be taken back.
It was perhaps a surprise for him
when I finally cut the ties
that bound me for so long,
honouring the invisible web of boundaries
that were woven in another time.

Every year I would try again
to be the prefect everything to everyone
to seek out the sweetness of honeyed words,
on their lips
the approval in their eyes
Love - the word does not sum it all up,
I wanted more than just love,
I wanted to matter, to be enough, to feel acknowledged, valued
like I have a purpose, a role of my own
I returned to this place of wanting and needing
of endless sweat and blood and toil
but not any more
I am not coming back
  - tell the bees I have gone.

Photo by Simon Berger on Unsplash